If you ask most men what their biggest pet peeves are where women are concerned, you might get myriad answers, ranging from their dislike of our mood swings, to our need for non-stop conversation. I polled over 2,000 men and asked them to name their top five biggest pet peeves when it came to women. Some were expected, others… not so much. Here’s what they said…
1. Not surprisingly, over 90% of the men polled, who ranged in ages from 23 to 74, listed a woman’s emotional response to problems as their number one pet peeve. “Men don’t fall apart in a conversation and start crying and going off on tangents,” was a common complaint in this area. The men wished women could just stay on the topic, list their grievances calmly and not resort to tears and bringing up every transgression the guy made since the day they met.
2. Second on the list were women begrudging their guy some time alone. “When she met me, she knew I played ball three nights a week and was fine with it,” Dennis from California said. “Once we had been dating for 3 weeks, she started complaining that I was not spending enough time with her and my sports were more important.” This came up quite often in the survey. Men began to lose interest in a woman when the lady became too needy and possessive of their time. Allowing men a Guy’s Night Out or time to do things he enjoys on his own actually made the guy more apt to want to spend time with his girl due to the fact he felt balance in his life. They told me men come back more focused on their women when they are “allowed” time with the guys or to pursue their interests. They also were more attracted to women who had pursuits of her own and didn’t need a guy to fill in her life for her.
3. Women talk twice as much as men do. Studies have proven that. It’s not surprising as women are more in tune with social interaction and the need to explore feelings and relationships. If you listen in on a man’s conversation with another man, you will get a crash course on how men think, and what their comfort zone is. Their conversation is very focused and brevity is usually key. (A few beers may impact that rule, but there it is.) A guy might say to another man, “New haircut?” His friend will say, “Yep.” That’s it… end of conversation. A woman will ask her female friend, “New haircut?” Her friend will reply, “Yes… I was tired of how long it took me to shampoo and style it every morning, so I cut off 5 inches. Do you like it?” “Oh, it’s to die for! It really frames your face and shows off your cheekbones!” “Thank you! I was nervous about a shorter look, but I really do like it!” So… men’s third biggest pet peeve was a woman’s need to talk and talk and talk, often on 12 subjects at once. Men just aren’t wired to that much verbiage all at once. It isn’t that men aren’t sensitive to wanting to know our thoughts, they just don’t communicate the same way and find themselves squirming after a woman has been talking for 30 minutes straight. Their advice was to try and get to your point quickly, or even tell them ahead of time what the conversation is about so that they don’t have to guess where you are going with all this dialogue.
4. “Women OVERTHINK EVERYTHING!” was a huge pet peeve men listed. They kept hammering home that “men are simple.” When they tell you something, just take it at face value, was an admonition that was listed time after time. They pointed out that women will ask them a question and then over-analyze the man’s answer. Having a woman ask over and over again for validation or more information after a man has answered her question really frustrated men in our survey. “If you ask what we want for dinner and we say, “Tacos are fine,” it means TACOS ARE FINE! “Don’t say, ‘Are you sure? Would you rather have Italian?'”
5. The fifth biggest pet peeve was a little more of a surprise. 87% of the men polled said they were tired of women obsessing about their appearance. Men were tired of women constantly asking if they look overweight, if their hair was OK, if they should buy a certain shirt, etc. “Men are attracted to women who are confident and happy in their own skin. You don’t see men asking if a woman likes his hair, tan, beer belly or dirty sneakers.” After raising 4 sons and hearing their complaints about their dates in this department, I can tell you men really do get tired of a woman’s constant need for validation. If you think you are overweight, do something about it. Take control of your life and like who you are. It is very sexy to a guy to be with a woman who has a “take me or leave me attitude” because they are happy with their life.
If you would like to see what the Bull Pen panel of men at Troubleshooting Men had to say when asked what they would change about women, please go to our website to see their answers on this and other questions posed by our members. You can also see more of the answers on our 2,000 Men Survey at the site under Dating/Relationships. It’s free and fun!
Make it sparkle!
Rebecca F. Pittman, creator of Troubleshooting Men
write by Cruz Ortega
